A Good Word

"And God gave Solomon wisdom and understanding beyond measure,

and breadth of mind like the sand on the seashore"

1 Kings 4:29

I now realize that “writing a blog” is not as easy as I thought it would be.

Especially about something that is so

precious, personal and sensitive to my heart.

I understand that in order for my blog to make sense and hopefully bless others, =
I need to be

transparent and vulnerable.

Not an easy thing to do for someone who is not good at grammar and
petrified of writing

In fact, it completely freaks me out.

But I know I need to do it.

Things for Chris and I have been made very clear to us.

It is very evident that we need to

pray pray and pray some more

in order to be on the same page through this whole process together.

It is very easy for me to move ahead of my husband

because I become so emotionally entangled

in the thought of loving the orphan

that I forget that I need to wait and follow my husband’s lead.

My heart is more emotionally invested at this time than my husbands.
(In other words, I am weeping at everything and thoughts are all consuming of the orphan)

Nothing is wrong with that.

In fact, I have read, that is normal.

Again, it's the mother in me just wanting to be that mother to the motherless.

However, a friend shared with my husband that this adoption

is not going to be about the “adoption”. (hah?)

It is going to be about our marriage.

Oh the truth that rang in my heart.

It’s going to be about what the Lord does in our lives through this process.

That if Chris and I are not together on every step; spiritually and emotionally,

it could be disaster for our lives.

Wow.

Hard words but very true.

This is Huge.

This is Big.

I am thankful for this friend. I am thankful for the wisdom in which was spoken.

Chris and I are so committed to understanding God’s call on our lives.

I know that the Lord has put this passion in my heart, that can not be denied.

I am truly humbled at the goodness of Christ.

I know the Lord has made this very clear to my husband that Biblically

we are called to care for the orphan.

So with that together...

I am excited to see where the Lord will lead us.

We are in earnest prayer.

Waiting on the Lord for His goodness, His timing, His Grace and His Will….

not ours.

God you are SO good!

You are SO faithful!

If we are willing, He is able!

God, would You use us for your Kingdom?

Prepare our hearts to seek Your Kingdom, not ours.

Strengthen us to do Your Work.

Humble us to serve not ourselves.

Bring Glory to Your name through our obedience to your Word!

“For whoever would save his life will lose it,

but whoever loses his life for my sake will find it."

Matthew 16:25